Bullying: A New Look at an Old Problem
June 10, 2009

Putting an end to bullying is everyone's responsibility.
Suppose tomorrow your son or daughter became the target of a school bully. Any idea what you would do?
America’s view of bullying is changing. It’s not happened easily or quickly, and we are far behind most European nations in addressing the issue of bullying. But now, from school to school, community to community, educators, psychologists, and pediatricians are all starting to take a new look at bullying, its causes, and possible preventions.
Next month the American Academy of Pediatrics will publish a new policy statement on the pediatrician’s role in preventing youth violence. For the first time it will cover the topic of bullying. Many doctor’s who specialize in the field of children’s health are glad to see this addition.
Dr. Joseph Wright, senior vice president at Children’s National Medical Center in Washington and the chairman of the pediatrics academy’s committee on violence prevention, told the New York Times that a quarter of all children report that they have been involved in bullying, either as bullies or as victims. “Protecting children from intentional injury is a central task of pediatricians,” Dr. Wright explains, “and bullying prevention is a subset of that activity.” In fact, it is estimated that each day in America 160,000 children refuse to go to school for fear of being bullied.
By definition, bullying occurs when a child is repeatedly the target of teasing, taunts or actual physical attacks. Indirect bullying, which occurs more commonly among girls, often takes the form of nasty rumors and social exclusion. This is often referred to as relational bullying which occurs when one student aims to hurt a relationship between two friends.
And now, apropos of the digital age, there is cyberbullying. This occurs mostly with the use of text messages, e-mails, instant messages, all aimed at isolating the target. It can also be used for threats and to post insulting pictures of the target child.
What researchers have begun to understand is that for schools to have any real hope to curtail bullying they need to focus in on a majority of students who can best be described as “bystanders.”
As one researcher explained to the Times, successful bullying intervention requires, “activating the bystanders.” This means changing the culture of the school so that all students are aware of the serious nature of bullying and the damage it can cause in both the life of the bully and the bully’s target(s). This can best be accomplished through class discussions, regular parent meetings and a school faculty and administrative staff that is committed to consistent responses to every incident. It is the school, after all, that must take a leadership role in making it clear that bullying will not be tolerated.
Finally, what should you do as a parent of either a bully, the target of a bully, or a bystander? Start with the recognition that bullying is preventable and it is not okay for other parents or school officials to respond with a casual, “kids will be kids,” answer. Bullying undermines the entire school community and has been known to lower class performance and grades for all involved, particularly the victim.
There are a variety of excellent programs that provide school-wide resolution for bullying problems. One such program can be found at www.nobully.com. For most parents of today, bullying was an ugly reality of their past. With a new awareness bullying doesn’t have to be an ugly reality in their children’s future.
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Other MVL Parenting Articles:
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Helicopter Parents: Grounding Your Natural Instincts
Sex Education, Part 1: What Both Parents and Teens Should Know
Sex Education, Part 2: Answering Tough Questions
Your Child’s 8 Different Forms of Intelligences
The Five Essential Messages of Positive Parenting
Parents, Beware of the Feelings Trap
Dating Violence: Is Your Teen Safe?
Is Your Teen Really Ready for College?
When Your Child Meets a Challenge
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