Six Bedroom Passion Killers
July 6, 2009
See if that remote has a button for rebooting your sex life.
There’s much to be said about being cozy and comfy in bed together. But be careful, a lot of those comfortable habits we take for granted can be passion killers. Here are six bedroom passion killers that couples should remember.
1. When it comes to TV, tune out. A recent study in Italy found that couples who have a television in the bedroom have sex half as often as those who don’t.
More specifically certain programs are passion killers. Violent films, for example, stopped sex dead in its tracks for half of all couples tested, while reality shows dampened passion for a third of all couples. Bottom line, keep the TV in any room but the bedroom.
2. Go to bed at the same time. Sometimes this just is not possible, and for some couples it rarely happens, but it is worth noting that slipping between the sheets at the same time greatly increases your chances for intimacy and is far more likely to lead to spontaneous sex.
3. Get the kids out of the bed. You don’t play in their sandbox, why should you let them play in yours? It might be cozy and fun to snuggle with the little ones on rare occasions, but try not to make it a habit. After all, isn’t it your hope when you go to bed with your partner to be lovers as opposed to parents. The simple truth is the best way to keep the kids out of your bed is not to have them there in the first place. The longer they are there with you the harder it will be to break them of this habit.
4. Breath check. The people who sell us 101 ways to freshen our breath have it right in one sense, bad breath is a turn off. There are a whole lot of reasons for bad breath but they all drop down to one bottom line, it’s a Class A intimacy killer. Fortunately there are many solutions including getting into the habit of cleaning your tongue as well as brushing your teeth. Unsure of how to get the job done? Speaking to your dentist is a good place to start.
5. Lighting up before bedtime. If you watch old movies of the 40s, through the 70s, and even more recently than that, you would think that there is nothing sexier than a cancer stick. Of course that’s what the tobacco companies would love for you to believe. In fact smoking is never sexy; from the bad breath it causes to the sallow complexion and yellow teeth that it leaves behind. And for men, here’s one more reason to ditch those cigarettes: they are linked to erectile function and are one of the major causes of impotence.
6. Nasty old pajamas. Sure they might be comfortable but your favorite PJs from 1999 might be badly in need of discarding. You don’t have to do away with comfort all together, there are plenty of soft choices you can make, but well worn ill fitting nightwear says, “stay clear,” and not, “come closer.”
Of course there  are other passion killers, and they can run the gamut from money troubles, to unresolved fights. The important thing to remember is that both partners must share and evaluate from time to time what works and does not work in their bedroom. After all in a perfect world this room is our temple of love as opposed to our temple of tomb. Use this list as a starter and add some items of your own. Feather your love nest with those things that are special to you and when the lights go down your passion will rise.
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August 27th, 2009 at 1:55 PM
In my opinion, I would add pets to “3. Get the kids out of the bed”. Having to compete for attention/affection (and bed space) with the family pet(s) is also a challenge and can the same consequences.
September 30th, 2009 at 11:36 AM
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