Great sex ensures a happy marriage.
The old stereotype that marriage is a sure way to ruin a healthy sex life turns out to be a myth. According to a variety of research studies about the sex lives of long term, or married couples, on average a committed couple has sex 61 times a year, which is anywhere from 25% to 300% more frequent than single men or women.
As you might expect, those averages can change substantially based on the age of couples surveyed. For example, couples between the ages of 18 and 29 have sex an average of 112 times per year. There is a steady decrease in the level of frequency as people age. Married couples 70 and older, on average, have sex 16 times a year.
That doesn’t mean if you’re 28 and you’re having sex once a week there is something wrong with you, just as you can be 70 and having sex more frequently than once every three weeks.
In fact in a recent survey by the American Association of Retired Persons, revealed that most mid-life and older adults were either extremely satisfied or at least somewhat satisfied with their sex life. Universally the couples surveyed believed that a regular sex life was an important quality-of-life factor.
A healthy sex life is a boost to your physical and mental well being. Rather than ever being ignored, a fulfilling sex life should be the goal of both partners. Certain physical issues can lead to a disruption of an otherwise healthy sex life. Principle among them is erectile dysfunction, which by age 40, will have been experienced at least briefly, by one out of every four men and by age 70, by one out of every two.
Whether through medication or other means, a urologist should be able to mitigate if not completely resolve this issue. It’s a part of life men should pay attention to and not a problem that should be allowed to linger. Sexual dysfunction is not the issue of one partner, but affects the lives of both. Don’t delay in getting such issues addressed.
As for emotional issues, too often we allow problems in other areas of our relationships to spillover into the bedroom. Sex becomes a wedge issue dividing couples rather than bringing them closer together. Both partners need to avoid that behavior. It’s true that it takes two to argue, and only two can resolve to allow disagreements to escalate into a cold war between the sheets.
Finally, there are many things you can do as a couple to re-spark a less than satisfying sex life. Here are five:
1. Sex-ed tapes are great because they help long term couples think about sex in new and exciting ways.
2. Stay fit. All of us would prefer to have sex with a person in-shape as opposed to out of shape. Take that attitude into your own bedroom. Fit is healthy, and healthy is sexy. It might involve some time and sacrifice to get into better shape, but your body and your mind will be glad that you did.
3. Tools of the trade: sex toys. If you’re not already using any, try a few out. No one is suggesting leather restraints, or kinky outfits compete with boots and a whip. But a vibrator might be fun. It’s true that variety is the spice of life and a new play toy every now and then might be that spice.
4. Cuddling is so wonderful. Too many couples think that touching begins and ends in the bedroom. The unexpected hug in the middle of the day, the warm kiss hello, and so many other small acts of intimacy serve as loving reminders that being close is something that is important to both of you.
5. Good sex is a symphony featuring a beginning, middle, and an end. Partners (read men) who rush to the “final movement,” are missing all the sweet music you can make together. So enjoy the kissing and the petting. Think of it as part of a full meal. You may love the steak, but save room for dessert.
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More MarsVenusLiving.com Articles on Romance and Sex
Why Beauty Is in the Eye of the Beholder
Sexercise: Fitness Never Felt So Good!
Four Kisses a Day Keep Divorce Away
Why Romances Makes Sense(s): All 5 of Them
A Kiss Is a Kiss? Hardly! It’s a Biology Test
Our Top 7 Random Acts of Passion
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