Passionate Monogamy: Having a Better Sex Life

June 2, 2009

Need to heat things up? Try showering together.

For some people the thought of having sex with just one person for the rest of their life is simply beyond comprehension. For them the idea of one intimate partner now and forever speaks of boredom. In truth, however, when you learn how to make sex spontaneous as opposed to mechanical, it never has to be boring.

Passion comes naturally for most couples in the early months and even years of a relationship. When a man is turned on to a woman and he has the idea that he can make her happy, he keeps returning to that same partner. Later on when he has, for whatever reason, disappointed her, that lustful feeling fades and he thinks that he can no longer make her happy. He may still love her, but that sense of urgent passion will diminish greatly.

For both partners it is an unhappy burden to be prisoners of a passionless relationship, and in this modern era that’s a choice that few people are willing to make. Using advanced relationship skills in and outside of the bedroom can reverse that sense of lost passionate and can allow your sex life to not only reignite but to burn hotter than it ever did before.

One mistake that both men and women make whenever new passion begins to diminish is to fall into a false sense that passion will never return. Passion, like all other aspects of life, rises and falls throughout the passage of time.

A second mistake for both partners is to become upset with themselves for finding another member of the opposite sex to be sexually attractive and desirable. Feelings of guilt often arise when and if that attraction is followed by a sexual fantasy.

A far better reaction than guilt is to take the energy from that attraction and that fantasy and put it back into you marriage. When we are in touch with our sexual feelings our sexual combustibility rises. Couples who reject those sexual urges unknowingly push themselves in the direction of becoming disinterested in sex altogether, not an outcome anyone would seek when considering the issue rationally as opposed to emotionally.

Sex is, and will always be, a source of great energy and renewal in any intimate relationship. It should not be neglected or put up on a shelf and forgotten because of unintended slights and disappointments.

Passion inevitably will pass through frequent cycles of peaks and valleys. That’s to be expected in every relationship. Passionate monogamy will always reignite so long as both partners remember to bring their sexual fantasies back home where they belong and where they can flourish without consequence. As the years of a shared life unfold, our sexual passion is one of the greatest gifts we can ever give to each other.

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Our Top 7 Random Acts of Passion

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